You Can't Always Get What You Want.

On these cold winter nights, there are a few things that remind me of someone.

Someone I work terribly hard at trying to forget.

But for the first time in a long time, perhaps ever, I am ready to admit to myself this is how I feel.

I miss you.

For the past year, its been an uphill battle. I know I can't have it both ways.

There is just not enough time in a day, a week, a month, nor a year. Correction, I just simply don't manage my time well enough to find that time.

So I made compromises. Or rather, I made sacrifices. 

I thought I had made the right decision. I thought this was what I wanted. But really, it is a constant battle between trying to figure out what I want and what I need. And right now, I need you.

Call it a Rolling Stones philosophy. Or call it the "forbidden fruit hypothesis". Or just simply call it "I wish I could have you here while I struggle through another unfocused night of writing a Psychology paper".

There's no going back now. You know it. I know it.

But I still just wanted to say it. Even if it makes no difference.

There is not much psychological logic to this post. But it has always been my belief that love and relationships are economical in psychological love and desire.

And though I could go on about what theories may explain how I feel. I won't. I can't.

This is emotional for me. It's raw. And it needed to be written in a raw, illogical, and perplexing manner.

So there it is. I miss you. And that's that.